There is a shape in my life where a child should be and my body keeps tripping over it. Everyone wanted to reassure me about later and I was only grieving this one life. It is such a specific pain to have no public memory for someone private and permanent inside you. The body does not forget just because the paperwork was brief. I keep imagining milestones for someone who never got to have one. Everyone wanted to reassure me about later and I was only grieving this one life.
For the little heartbeat that never got to stay